Fantasizing about Sir Pizza. The only pizza to be knighted by the Pizza King, Harold. Harold the Pizza King.
Pizza Adventures: Sir Pizza
I’m not sure how a pizza gets knighted, or even why a pizza wants to be knighted. Perhaps there was once a dragon who pillaged villages for their pizza and hoarded hundreds of slices in their cave? Then, Sir Pizza emerged from a pizza oven to answer the prayers of the villagers and defeat the pizza dragon. All I know is that if every pizza of the roundtable tasted as genuine and delicious as Sir Pizza I can guarantee you I would devour them in seconds.
I don’t find myself wandering in the Sir Pizza neighborhood as much as I’d like to these days. There was a time where my Pizza Pal, Pat, worked at Sir Pizza which gave me an unlimited number of reasons to visit the parlor. That was a time in my life was filled with a thick pizza haze and diced pepperoni’s. Surprisingly, not much has changed. Insider secret: did you know the staff of Sir Pizza hates when you play Cheesburger in Paradise on the jukebox? Try it out sometime!
This evening’s pizza event found me and Pizza Pal Adam splitting a small plain pizza. “But Pizza Journalist Dan,” you’re clamoring, “how can two grown adults manage to survive on a singular 10 inch plain pizza?” That’s a great question! One day science will create a 10 inch pizza that will appease two adults and solve the world’s hunger problem. In this case, we ravaged the pizza like vultures encountering fresh road kill then starred at each other waiting for someone to suggest we order another one. It didn’t matter if it was a vagabond or the pizza knight himself. We just needed a reason.
For most people, double dipping into pizza would be a sign of impending rock bottom, but for me it was just one of those “day in the life” scenario. And yes, we got a second pizza.
What separates Sir Pizza from second tier pizza parlors and the slew of “New York Wannabes” is the way they cut their pizza. As you can see you don’t get slices, you get squares. This is perfect for a number of reasons:
- You actually have no idea how many slices you’ve eaten which makes eating your weight in pizza more feasible than ever. It’s like eating air covered with sauce and cheese.
- You can make awesome designs by strategically eating some slices. Some of my favorites are a duck or a sail boat.
Not enough can be said about the crispiness and freshness of the pizza. Every time I eat there the pizza is perfectly cooked. There’s never too much cheese, grease isn’t eating its way through the table, and ingredients aren’t piled on. I don’t know how much they eyeball toppings/cheese, but their standards are spot on and they’d be a fool to change just about anything. The only wild card is that sometimes the peel is over salted, which can leave some salt residue on the bottom of your pie.
Some people might be bothered by a hint of salt, but I secretly pray for those moments. That salt adds an endearing element, almost as though you’ve been inducted as an honorable pizza knight for the evening. Plus, it brings out some of the flavor.
I can’t recommend Sir Pizza enough to travelers to the city. It’s a shame the closest one is out in the North Hills, but if you find yourself in the area stop on by, put a dollar in the jukebox, and play some Cheeseburger in Paradise. Also, it’s one of the only establishments that has a Pac-Man and Dig Dug cocktail arcade cabinet. Five pizzas out of five.