Does Your Smoke Alarm Function? Here's a Pizza. →

Is free pizza the true motivator in life? For me, yes. For many other people, probably. In Fort Myers, FL, the South Trail Fire Department has teamed up with Domino’s to provide free pizzas to residents that have working smoke detectors. 

I’m in awe of this promotion and can’t tell if this is a desperate last measure or a wink of genius from the depths of Florida insanity. How many houses have burned down before the fire chief said, “The only way we can penetrate these idiots is through some sort of edible Trojan Horse. Get me Domino’s on the line, Frank.”

I pray one day that this promotion catches on and I’m rewarded for daily activities with pizza. I won’t rest until my prize for going to the dentist is a slice of pizza topped with fluoride. Better yet, pizza flavored fluoride. 

I’ll be at the patent office if anyone needs me.