Hi. Pizza is a food that can strike at any moment. During a party, during sad times and during the times of your life that you’ll remember for ages to come. To ensure you’re always near a pizza shop I’m going to do my best to educate you about the best pizza you can digest in nearly any scenario. Today, we’ll talk about pizza strategy for a Pittsburgh Pirate’s game.
Summer is approaching and with the heat, humidity and moderate amount of quality Pittsburgh sunshine comes baseball. To cheer on the Buccos you’re going to need some good pizza.
Here’s some pizza places to eat at when you go to a Pittburgh Pirate’s Game.
Giovanni’s employees a clumsy italian man who’s only job is to drop his biscotti and, when he bends over to pick it up, use his rotund rump to knock a canister of sugar into a vat of their sauce.
With that in mind, this is the kind of pizza place you go to if you have kids tagging along for a hot day at the park. The sweetness of the pizza will cut though any attitude and perk up toddlers and teens alike. Their palates won’t mind the sweetness and you’ll happily choke this down.
Eat this pizza when: The Pirates play the Atlanta Braves. It’s the pizza version of sweet tea and will really get you into the southern spirit.
Diamond Pizza in PNC Park
Image credit: Pizza Pizazz
When I was a child and my dad took me to baseball games at Three Rivers Stadium I would cry in my seat until he returned with pizza. I was a pouty kid, the kind of kid who would throw a vacuum cleaner down the steps for no reason. So, when the pizza finally arrived I’d take a sabbatical from crying from nothing and instead cry that the pizza tasted too much like wine.
My dad never gave me wine so I had no frame of reference, but it was gross enough that I would choke down half the pizza and call it quits. I think that pizza was Pizza Hut pizza.
Anyways, Diamond Pizza Place does not taste like wine. It’s a solid place to get pizza inside the ballpark.
Eat this pizza when: The Pirates play the New York Yankees. They’ll sell you a big ol’ NY slice of pizza. Then, when AJ Burnett walks a guy you can shout (in a sloppy New York accent) “Hey, I’m walking here!”
Stone Neapolitan Pizzeria
Stone pizza combines the Chipotle / Henry Ford assembly line mentality with the frugality and practicalness of an Italian grandmother who follows her heart to make a warm, gooey pizza. You pick the toppings, sauce and oil and the pizzaiolo behind the counter will fix you up a pizza faster than Marte can run the bases.
Eat this pizza when: The Pirates play the Cubs. You can eat authentic, fancy pizza and brag that the pizza was made faster than it takes to cut a single slice of their thick Chicago Pizza.
Monte Cello’s is the pizzeria you went with your high school sweetheart after a high school football game. After your ninth refill of Pepsi, six slices of pizza and a win for the home team you were filled with the feeling invincibility and enough gas to float a hot air balloon over the Grand Canyon.
There’s a Monte Cello’s downtown that exists to pay homage to your childhood. Every slice that comes out of that oven is sprinkled with a proprietary blend of parmesan, pepper and nostalgia.
Eat this pizza when: The Pirates play the team from the hometown you moved from so you could go to CMU / work for Google.
On the other end of the Rachel Carson bridge is Pizza Parma. It’s a pizza shop that exists on an ever-changing corner, except it is untouched by time. Pizza Parma adheres to no rules but their own and they’re not rules you’ll ever be familiar with.
Their slices are large, cheesy and capable of absorbing any poisons that linger in your stomach. It is both a panacea and a hinderance to your health. Choose from the Barnyard Special, the Taco Pizza, or the BBQ Chicken pizza.
Eat this pizza when: The Pirates are playing an unimportant game and you’re mostly there to tailgate, roll into the stadium in the fourth inning and boo Ryan Braun
Special Shoutout to the Beer Market
The Beer Market, located right next to PNC Park, turns the BYOB formula on its head. They have hundreds of beers to choose from and they welcome you to bring in any food. But really, you’re going to bring pizza.
You can grab pizza from any of the places above, bring it to the Beer Market and enjoy a number of beers. Getting a seat can be a strategic undertaking, but if you’re cunning and persistent you’ll have no problem.
Now you’re prepared to eat pizza next time you go to a Pirate’s game. If you enjoyed this, go ahead and tell a bud or two! You can even sign up for my pizza newsletter to get great stuff like this delivered directly to your inbox.