Pizza Walk With Me

Let's get hyped up over some pizza.

Dan TallaricoComment
Let this mess of a pizza serve as a warning to pizza enthusiasts around the globe. The pizza globe. Mercurio’s, which I’ve previously praised, served me this mess that disintegrated faster than the nazi that chose poorly in The Last Crusade. The fragile and flaky crust couldn’t hold the weight of the toppings. Who can blame it? Even Atlas himself would think twice about supporting artichokes, peppers, mushrooms and cheese. I usually frown on toppings. I ordered this hoping to spice up my life and restore my faith in the segment of the pizza population that piles their pizza higher than the Tower of Babel. Do they think they’ll make it to pizza heaven? My heaven is a flat pizza. Safe from tremors and far from the cosmos. This pizza was vile. A Frankenstein of a mess. I now understand the rage of those villagers. Something as abysmal as this just shouldn’t exist.

Let this mess of a pizza serve as a warning to pizza enthusiasts around the globe. The pizza globe.

Mercurio’s, which I’ve previously praised, served me this mess that disintegrated faster than the nazi that chose poorly in The Last Crusade. The fragile and flaky crust couldn’t hold the weight of the toppings. Who can blame it? Even Atlas himself would think twice about supporting artichokes, peppers, mushrooms and cheese.

I usually frown on toppings. I ordered this hoping to spice up my life and restore my faith in the segment of the pizza population that piles their pizza higher than the Tower of Babel. Do they think they’ll make it to pizza heaven? My heaven is a flat pizza. Safe from tremors and far from the cosmos. This pizza was vile. A Frankenstein of a mess. I now understand the rage of those villagers. Something as abysmal as this just shouldn’t exist.